Blog: I’m Cold!!! by Jessie Close

I just returned home from Tucson.  It’s Autumn there too but you’d never know it!  Blue skies, seventies, perfect.  Why do I live in Montana?  At this point, I really don’t know.  I got up this morning to howling winds and leaves flying everywhere, bits of my ancient roof flying across the yard.  My house felt like it was moving the wind was so strong.  Then I put on a hat and my winter coat and drove to town.  Now I remember why I live here!  Clouds were hanging along the mountains, rolled up like a long, white quilt.  The mountain tops peeked out above the clouds, the sun glancing on the new snow, clean white.  Stunning.

I had such fun in Tucson and participated in the 30th anniversary celebration of Southern Arizona NAMI.  Six cousins came to hear me speak and I hope were not disappointed.  I have a whole nest of cousins down there and I just love being around them.  

Today I’m fostering a tiny, 11 week old puppy.  We were walking, rambling really, around the outside of my house and suddenly I saw something scary; two huge piles of seed filled poop in my front yard.  And I mean huge!  This means that what the older dogs were barking at last night were bears.  This means that bears climbed over my fence to get into the yard, and out.  Can you picture this?  I was probably innocently watching TV, yelling at the dogs to stop barking, as bears, or one bear with a bad stomach ache, were rooting around and pooping in my yard.  That’s a pretty funny picture actually… 

The puppy; he weighs probably two pounds and is a terror.  He’s so tiny that I have to be careful to not step on him.  My livingroom floor is covered with toys and paper and bones, kind of turning my house into a canine cave. 

Today I really wanted to go for a walk in the woods but… no.  It is a bit daunting to know that a bear might be in the woods.  Isn’t there a joke about that?  But, hey, there are worse things in life.

This puppy is not just exhausting but is so cute I’m going to have a hard time giving him up.  He is completely bonded to me and has to know where I am at all times.  I’ll have him for only two weeks then he’ll go to two little girls.  I named him Spot because he’s so small he looks like an ink spot on the rug.  I’m sure they’ll change his name… 

Dogs help me enormously.  I don’t think I’d be as well as I am these days without them.  Having a puppy for two weeks is heaven.  Especially a puppy who is so small that he can sleep on my shoulder.  But, to tell you the rest of the truth, I’m not in the market for a puppy to stay longer than two weeks.  I know my routine helps me too and my routine has been blasted by Spot!  But he’s so CUTE!  Why does Nature make all babies so cute???  So they won’t be killed.  But back to my routine…

Having Spot has taught me a thing or two about how important my routine is to my well being.  Just adding Spot to my day has left me with the anxiety that goes along with lack of sleep and constant tension.  When I put Spot into his cage for a nap my anxiety doesn’t leave me it just changes into being afraid he’ll wake up too soon.  Too soon means I won’t get done what I want to get done while he’s sleeping and not terrorizing the other dogs and the floor of my house.  This is reminiscent of when one of my children were napping and I was torn between napping also or doing what needed to get done – like laundry or cooking or cleaning or catching up on work. Or simply sleeping while they were asleep.  How did I do that?! 

I visited with my daughter-in-law’s mother yesterday in Bozeman and finally met the new baby in that family; Megan’s sister’s baby.  Terri is taking care of the baby while Megan’s sister is at work.  It all came back to me – how hard it is to have a baby and how hard it is to dedicate each day to that baby, especially when there are older children involved.  I can only say that my hat goes off to parents and grandparents.  Getting a child to 18 years old is daunting and luckily only done in stages. 

For now, however, I only have to worry about Spot and get him to his new family in a week.  (Yes!)  Then I can relax and fall back into my healthy routine.  And I won’t be getting a puppy any time soon!