Working to end the stigma and discrimination of mental illness.

Jessica’s Story

I was diagnosed with manic depressive disorder about 3 years ago, but I've been dealing with it since I was 12 years old. From 12 to 15 years old I constanly daydreamed about ending the pain permanently. There were so many nights that I would wake up and think "tonight it ends. I'll never have to feel this way anymore. I won't have to hurt anymore". Then I would see my sweet, wonderful identical twin sister asleep. We've always shared a room as well as everything else and she means more than anything to me. And, in the end, I never could bring myself to end my life because I knew I would be causing her an inconcievable amount of pain and I just could not do that to her. I am so lucky to have been born with the person who makes me complete. She is always there to listen to me and tries her best to help me.

I have so much self-hate. I have nightmares constantly. I'm always angry and sad. But my sister holds me everytime it gets too much to bear. She comforts me and helps me calm down. I recently broke up with a boyfriend who I told about my disorder and he called me mentally retarded and psycho. I never thought that would hurt as much as it did. My sweet sister was there for me. When we saw a commercial for Bring Change 2 Mind she said "I hope he saw that". I couldn't do this without her.

If youre hurting reach out to your family and friends who you trust. They love you and they just want to help you feel better. Open up and let them be there for you. And always remember that you are not alone. There are others who feel the same way you do. Those people who put you down and don't even try to understand what you're going through are ignorant and they really don't matter. You are strong. You can do this. You're not alone. Don't give up on yourself
and those who love you.